I grew up obsessed with end times conspiracy theories. My childhood dreams were filled with the Illuminati, the New World Order and other similar things. The Mark of the Beast (666) was one of the biggest concerns I came across. Everybody was afraid of being forced and/or tricked into getting the mark.
Of course, if you could figure out what the Mark of the Beast would actually be, then you would be able to avoid it. All of the conjecture was centered around the idea that you will not be able to buy or sell without the Mark of the Beast (see Revelation 13:16-18). Depending on who you talked to, that could mean a lot of different things. (Just Google “Mark of the Beast” and you’ll see over 7 million pages devoted to it.)
Most people believed that the mark would appear in stages. There would be a gateway Mark of the Beast, something less oppressive that would dull our conscience, making us easier targets for the Antichrist. One of the most common theories was a fingerprint scanner that would automatically deduct money from your checking account.
It will never happen. There is no way Americans would let anyone have their fingerprints.
The unthinkable has become true.
I was at my local grocery store, when I noticed that they had incorporated Pay By TouchTM technology. All I wanted were some yams. I didn’t realize that I would have to pledge allegiance to the Antichrist to get them. I don’t care how good they are. No yam is worth eternal hellfire and damnation.
Begin the countdown. Armageddon is coming.